This is a phrase I've been playing through my mind for a few months.
The past year was a learning experience for us all, but one thing it taught me specifically was that I was focusing on all the wrong things. I was so tunnel vision on being "the best" and trying to be the most successful that I could possibly be; in that I lost more than I gained. For the 10 years I've spent in the industry as a stylist and educator, I worked hard and got myself to a place I would definitely say that I'm happy with. But when I look back on all the weddings, birthday parties, soccer games, family cookouts that I missed while working so hard towards "success", my heart breaks a little. Hairstylist are notorious for being "YES!" people. We feel like we cant say no to our guests because we will be letting you down and hey, its money right? In that mindset, we lose sight of ourselves chasing after the S word.
When Covid came and we were all stuck in quarantine, I started thinking how angry I was that I'd spent the last 9 years working 4-5 12 hour days a week and every Saturday. If this deadly virus was really going to come change the world this much and things were never going to be the same- I missed out on a lot! I never traveled much because that meant taking time off.. If big concerts were a thing of the past, I cant believe my last one was my LAST ONE! Family gatherings haven't been the same because of the elderly being at risk.. was that Christmas Eve I spent working the last one we would have with my grandparents?! You get the picture. I realized that if something came and wiped me out.. I did a lot of work and a little play. I want a balance. One that makes me feel full on work/ personal.
Having my first babe has really changed my thought process too. I never want to miss a beat in his busy life. Since returning from maternity leave, I am working part time. It's the best way to give everyone the best versions of me. I already feel so liberated making that choice for ME. And all summer, I'm going extra part-time. I am closing all my Saturdays and only opening them the month-of to ensure I don't miss any family cookouts, nephews soccer games, friends weddings, or a crazy concert I want to go to just because I miss that feeling of live music so much.
I'm finding that the success is found when you're focused on the most simple things. Gone are the days where I'm straining myself just to get in one more guest and missing out on things I want to be present for. I will not feel guilty for closing out a day from work to take a trip with my husband. I'm finding a beautiful balance in my work and personal life and I highly encourage you to do the same.
xo, tae
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